Life

Jude’s birth story: Part 1

March 17, 2017

This is part one of Jude’s birth story, you can read Coltrane’s birth story here


It’s been a journey to get here and one I know so many woman find themselves on. A year ago we were mourning yet another loss and really wondering if I’d ever be able to carry another baby full term. I’d reached this point of complacency, forcing myself to accept what was and what wasn’t.

A couple days after my last miscarriage I was on a plane to San Francisco for my monthly work trip to the city we’d moved from just months earlier and one I didn’t like going back to. I remember sitting in the airport and with a delayed flight, finding myself researching miscarriage yet again. But this time I typed in ‘multiple miscarriages’ and an article about hormones happened to catch my eye. I began reading and immediately felt I’d happened upon the answer to what was ‘wrong’ with me. Why hadn’t any doctor (natural or otherwise) suggested I get my progesterone checked? I quickly texted my midwife Taylor from Seattle who caught my first son Coltrane and she said a hormone panel is the first thing she does when there is a history of miscarriages. So I did and the results were alarming. I was told, ‘you have the hormones of a 50yr old. If you don’t change something soon, you’ll likely go through menopause in the next few years’. Specifically my progesterone was severely low, as was my cortisol. I was running on fumes, physically and mentally. The previous few years had taken their toll and it was showing in a very real way. My doctor gently urged me to seriously consider leaving my job or at the very least discontinue traveling. At the time leaving my job seemed too much to handle, a career I’d dedicated 10yrs to, working my way up and sacrificing so much for…I wasn’t ready to make that decision. I began with cutting my travel and setting some boundaries with work…something I’ve always struggled with.

Over the following months things began to become more clear, specifically my calling as a mother and woman began to gain clarity. I’d always found my identity in my career, but I am so much more than a creative director or designer of the ‘next greatest cell phone’. I’m a mother. And I was beginning to realize that being a mother was enough. In fact it was more than enough. My years of believing I had to have some major career or climb the ladder or be just like the men I worked with (and better) was slowly dissolving. The lie myself and society had been telling me, that motherhood alone was not enough of an accomplishment or worth, was becoming more apparent. I’m always one to have 10 plates spinning at one time, so it wasn’t as though I wouldn’t have other interests or pursuits (i.e. Woolful), but I was beginning to find a peace that didn’t exist before and a deeper love for motherhood. A deeper love for my beautiful son Coltrane, if such a thing was possible.

What I didn’t know was that a month later I would find myself pregnant again, this time completely by surprise and that because of the hormone panel, I’d have a really good chance to carry the baby full term with the help of a progesterone supplement and lifestyle changes.

For the next 9 months I experienced so many emotions. Intense fear and joy. Every twinge or change or feeling sent my mind in a direction of anxiety. The appointment where we heard the heartbeat, lying there trying to relax, remembering before when we could no longer find heart tones. This time the midwife was struggling to find it, but reassured me. I pressed my eyes shut and prayed. Moments later a strong steady beat. Tears of incredible relief and joy shook my entire body. Coltrane sat next to me a bit confused, patting my leg and telling me it was going to be ok. This little boy, the boy who had told me months earlier that we needed a ‘baby brudder’, was so sure.

As Summer passed and Fall neared, I found myself continually in awe that I was able to experience this all over again. Had you asked me after Coltrane I’d have told you I wasn’t very fond of the pregnancy part, but that had changed…I was now fond…quite fond. Give me every ache, pain, heartburn and pound. I refused to take any of it for granted.

And then came November. My so incredibly well timed ‘Thanksgiving’ baby was soon to make himself known. I’d been envisioning this birth for years now. When we first bought the property I had dreamed that one Winter as the snow fell, I would have a baby in our warm and cozy yurt. I held onto that dream and it did indeed become a reality.

Woolspiration

Woolspiration: Knitting Pretty c.1955

March 4, 2017

It’s been far too long since I’ve posted a Woolspiration post. I’ve been gathering an archive over the past year and am looking forward to sharing these videos, articles and books with you more regularly.

Today we have a great film from the past, ‘Knitting Pretty‘. This charming piece is filmed in Kodachrome and features a woman named Patricia Scott. She is a knitting adviser for Lavenda and her job is to visit conferences and shops, helping customers choose wools, needles, patterns and answer questions. The film gives some background on wool processing, choosing ply, the best way to wind the wool, how to calculate gauge, and even how to wash your woolens. While all of this information we find readily available today online, in your LYS or in a book…’Knitting Pretty’ takes you back to a day when this information wasn’t as easy to come by, yet creating your own garments was just as sought after, if not more so.

To watch the extract of the film, go here or click photo below.

 

Woolful Podcast

Episode 76: Matthew Cox & Christina Miller – Arts, Food Justice, Icelandic sheep, and Greenbow Farm

March 2, 2017

Sponsor: Taproot Magazine, is a quarterly print magazine full of delightful stories and photos written by and for people living fuller and digging deeper. Each issue is created around a subtle theme, featuring amazing recipes, crafts, and tales, all with the intention of inspiring people who are interested in deepening their connections to their families, communities, and themselves as they strive to live locally and closer to the ground. The content in each issue consistently blows me away. It is fulfilling and inspiring. The most recent issue WEAVE features a collection of wonderful finds as we close out Winter and step in Spring. With lessons in growing Cosmos, Paleo and homemade bitters recipes, Wendell Berry and Tasha Tudor essays, and a collection of knitting and crochet how-to’s. There is so much goodness in each issue. You can visit Taproot Magazine online at Taprootmag.com and on Instagram @taprootmag.

Fiber folk: Over the past few years I’ve had the pleasure of getting to know Matt and Christina of Greenbow Farm…first discovering their yarn, visiting their farm and following their incredible journey on Instagram. This first generation family run farm is an inspiration, that with hard work, sacrifice, gumption, drive and business savvy, you can achieve your farm dreams. They are ‘doing it’, creating a living on and from their farm. I hope you’ll take some time to visit their site, Instagram and shop and if you’re in the Seattle area, you can find them at the West Seattle Farmer’s Market every Sunday. Visit greenbowfarm.com and find them on Instagram @greenbowfarm.

Sponsor: I want to thank Taproot Magazine again for sponsoring this week’s episode. With the natural, easygoing and heartfelt focus of each issue, I find myself continuing to go back to it throughout the quarter, gaining a little something each time and looking forward to the upcoming issue. Make sure to check out the most recent issue WEAVE, featuring the Quill hat pattern from Andrea Mowry knit in Stone Wool, Three French Hens knit toy pattern from Susan B Anderson knit in Bartlett Wool Co. and the Rosemound Scarf crochet pattern from Ashlynn Holmes crocheted in Quince and Co. I highly recommend you visit Taprootmag.com and renew or subscribe. 

Knitalong: This past November we kicked off the year long Woolful and Biches & Buches knit along. You can join any time this year by casting on one of Biches & Buches patterns or a project with one of their yarns. Visit bichesetbuches.com to be inspired and find your project kit or yarn and visit Woolful.com for more info on this knit along. This week we have another knit along giveaway winner, Theresa L. You’ve won a $30 gift card to the Woolful Mercantile. Congratulations!

Giveaway:The winners of last weeks giveaway are MaryBeth, Danna and Becky. You’ve won a copy of Sylvia McFadden’s Shawl Joy and a Skein of Woolful’s Cottage yarn. Congratulations!

This week’s giveaway is sponsored by Taproot Magazine and Greenbow Farm and they’re giving away a 2 year subscription to Taproot, 2 skeins of Stone Wool yarn to knit Andrea Mowry’s hat patterns in, and 2 skeins of Greenbow Farm Lopi yarn. To enter leave a comment on this blogpost. 

Music by Jónsi.